Video transcript
Drama Ensembles 2021 - Puppetry Ensemble - 03. Group B

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[intro music]

NELLIE: Yesterday, they arrested my mother and framed her for the crimes of her evil boss Brutus McCorp. My father is in his room, on his deathbed, from grief and fear for my mother. What am I to do?

It is Christmas Eve, and here in my hand, I hold two letters, both from Mr. McCorp. One is a notice of eviction from his company who owns this house, and they will cast us out this very night. The other is his proposal of marriage. He says if I marry him, we can stay in this house. And he will find the evidence to free my mother.

It's all too much to bear. How can I marry him? He's a villain, and has destroyed my family's happiness. But if I don't, then I am alone and responsible for how low my family must fall. If only my true love, sweet Drake Dogooder, was here, he would come to my aid, and all would be well.

But my dearest love is in the Amazon fighting for the forest. Or perhaps he's saving the seals in Antarctica. Oh, I just can't keep track of all his good deeds. Now he will never know my real love and admiration for him.

I have sent a telegram telling him about our plight. But what if he never gets it? What should I do? I'm ruined. [sobs]

BADGER: Knock, knock.

BRUTUS: Boo hoo.

BADGER: No, the next line is, 'Who's there?'


BADGER: I say, 'Knock, knock,' and you say, 'Who's there?' Here, I'll show you. Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. And then you say, 'Boo hoo.' And then I say, 'There's nothing to cry about.'


BADGER: Or is it a line about a ghost? [sighs] I can't remember.

BRUTUS: Shut it, Badger. Now where was I?


BRUTUS: Boo hoo. Did I hear your salty crocodile tears? What do I care for your sadness? You know what to do to make all of this right. And you hold both choices in your hands right now.

NELLIE: I do not love you.

BRUTUS: I do not care.

BADGER: We do not care.

BRUTUS: Although you have never shown me affection, and are repelled by my appearance, I will make you my wife. Where is your hero now? Nowhere.

But should he turn up, I set a trap to rid the whole world of Dogooder forever. I have several monkeys with bananas staking out this house. And they've been told to peel him on sight, should he come near.

BADGER: Do you? How do you know that many people with bananas?

BRUTUS: They're for hire.

BADGER: And how much is that costing the business?

BRUTUS: It's tax deductible. Now, my dear, it is just you and me and your decision. What do you say? Shall you marry me, or choose the destitute life for you and your family? Make your decision now.

NELLIE: I have no choice. I must save my family. I must say yes, even though he's the most odious man alive, and his sidekick smells like onions.

BRUTUS: A wise choice. Let us get ready.


BRUTUS: Yes. The nuptials will take place tonight.

NELLIE: I must try to delay him if my Drake is to arrive in time. I must do whatever I can to postpone this dreadful wedding. [clears throat] But I must ready myself.

I have the dress all chosen, and wanted to do something special with my hair. A woman cannot be rushed. I may not have wanted to marry you. In fact, I would rather have married a snake than you. I would rather have married Badger than you.

BADGER: Would you?

BRUTUS: Harsh.

NELLIE: But if I must marry you, then I want the wedding of my dreams-- the flowers, 15 bridesmaids, the diamond ring, the carriage, the dress, the beach location, a professional makeover, the honeymoon in Bali, got to get my hair and nails done, the lace shoes, the veil, a cute little dog with a silky vest with the words 'Just Married,' and the cushion he drags up the aisle bearing the rings, the--

BRUTUS: Enough!

NELLIE: I'm only getting started.

BRUTUS: Marry me now, or heaven help me, I'll drag your father from his bed and throw him into the street myself.

DRAKE: Never fear, Drake is here.

BRUTUS: What are you doing here, Dogooder? I thought I used everything in my power to destroy you.

DRAKE: You sound disappointed, McCorp. But none of your feeble attempts to destroy me could stand in the way of this monstrous wedding between you my true heart's love, Nellie.

When you torpedoed my ship, 'The Saving Grace,' I valiantly swam the hundreds of miles to shore. When you sent a shark to eat me as I fought my way through the waves with salty despair, I punched him in the nose. Then when you tried to have me peeled outside, I set the monkeys down and explained the fragile nature of mortality, and the path to salvation. Laying down their guns, they immediately began volunteer work, and are out there now, cleaning the streets and feeding the stray cats and dogs.

BRUTUS: Drat and bother, Drake Dogooder. I didn't think I could hate you more than I did before you arrived. And then you go and do something like that?

DRAKE: That's not all. I went to the police station before I arrived, and delivered the real documents of your embezzlement and destruction. Nellie's poor mother is free and is on her way with the police to arrest you.

BRUTUS: Dogooder, I think you are forgetting one thing. I have my hands on the girl, and I will kill her before I give her over to you. If I can't have her, no one will.

[gasps, cries, sounds of struggle]

NELLIE: You should be ashamed of yourself. You know what, I'm not even mad. I'm just disappointed.

DRAKE: That's my girl. She's so feisty. Perhaps I can convince Badger to marry us.

BRUTUS: (SOBBING) I had a tough childhood. You wouldn't understand!

NELLIE: Would your younger self be proud of the man you've become?


DRAKE: Well, you have plenty of time to reflect on your personal growth journey in gaol. And now, my dearest Nellie, shall we marry?

NELLIE: Yes, a thousand times, yes!

DRAKE: Badger?

BADGER: At your service, sir. Do you need your bridesmaids, the diamond ring, the beach location, the--

NELLIE: With you by my side, I have everything I need.

End of transcript